Lynne Baab • Friday November 12 2021
A few days after my always-helpful husband, Dave, proofread my recent book on grief and gratitude, he told me that he was seeing grief and gratitude everywhere. He was studying Ezra and Nehemiah, and they are full of both, he said. As the Jewish people returned from exile in Babylon, there were so many challenges and so much to grieve: Jerusalem’s city walls and temple lay in ruins, the rebuilding took much longer than expected, and the people kept falling into idolatry. Yet the first celebration of the Passover and the Feast of Tabernacles presented such lovely opportunities to express thanks for God’s mighty acts in the Exodus. Those festivals also provided the opportunity to compare the ways the return from exile mirrored the Exodus – and to thank God.
My new book is based on a quotation from psychotherapist Francis Weller, who argues that a mark of maturity is learning to hold grief in one hand and gratitude in the other, allowing ourselves to be stretched large by both. “Grief and gratitude are everywhere,” Dave said. “After reading your book, I see them.” In a world that emphasizes optimism and getting things done, the challenge is to rest in grief and gratitude long enough to let them stretch us.
I was surprised how clearly grief and gratitude are present in a favorite poem, God’s Grandeur by Gerard Manley Hopkins (1844-1889). It was written in 1877, during a time of increased industrialization. The poem lets us know that Hopkins, an English Jesuit priest, was concerned about the way factory workers are “smeared with toil.” We don’t have to look very far to see the way the world is “bent,” a word Hopkins uses in the last line of the poem.
Yet God continues to give us enormous joy through nature, which Hopkins describes so powerfully. And who wouldn’t benefit from taking time to remember the Holy Spirit’s presence in and through everything? As you read the poem, watch for things to be thankful for and to grieve.
The world is charged with the grandeur of God.
It will flame out, like shining from shook foil;
It gathers to a greatness, like the ooze of oil
Crushed. Why do men then now not reck his rod?
Generations have trod, have trod, have trod;
And all is seared with trade; bleared, smeared with toil;
And wears man's smudge and shares man's smell: the soil
Is bare now, nor can foot feel, being shod.
And for all this, nature is never spent;
There lives the dearest freshness deep down things;
And though the last lights off the black West went
Oh, morning, at the brown brink eastward, springs —
Because the Holy Ghost over the bent
World broods with warm breast and with ah! bright wings.
If you’d like to read more about the imagery in the poem, I found this description helpful.
In my short new book, I explain the patterns of grief and gratitude I see in the Psalms, Jesus’ teaching and interaction with people, Jesus’ journey to the cross, and the apostle Paul’s letters. I also describe the societal patterns and inner messages that can keep us from sitting with grief and gratitude long enough to be stretched large by them.
Each chapter concludes with discussion questions, so I am hoping small groups and churches might use the book in Advent or Lent. If you could consider that for your church or recommend it to someone who could consider it, I’d be grateful.
I am praying that this picture of holding grief in one hand and gratitude in the other will be as fruitful for readers of the book (and this blog) as it has been for me.
(Next week: when do we hold grief and gratitude in two hands simultaneously and when does one hand take precedence? Illustration by Dave Baab: Corner Peak, Lake Hawea, New Zealand. I love to get new subscribers. Sign up below to receive an email when I post on this blog.)
In last few months of 2019, shortly after I discovered the two hands quotation, I wrote a series of blog posts about it. Here are the early posts in the series:
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Lynne M. Baab, Ph.D., is a teacher and writer. She has written numerous books, Bible study guides, and articles for magazines and journals. Lynne is passionate about prayer and other ways to draw near to God, and her writing conveys encouragement for readers to be their authentic selves before God. She encourages experimentation and lightness in Christians spiritual practices. Read more »
Lynne is pleased to announce the release of her 2024 book, Friendship, Listening and Empathy: A Prayer Guide, illustrated with her husband Dave's beautiful watercolors. She is thrilled at how good the watercolors look in the printed book. Another recent book is Two Hands: Grief and Gratitude in the Christian Life, available in paperback, audiobook, and for kindle. Lynne's 2018 book is Nurturing Hope: Christian Pastoral Care for the Twenty-First Century, and her best-selling book is Sabbath-Keeping: Finding Freedom in the Rhythms of Rest (now available as an audiobook as well as paperback and kindle). You can see her many other book titles here, along with her Bible study guides.
You can listen to Lynne talk about these topics: empathy, bringing spiritual practices to life. Sabbath keeping for recent grads., and Sabbath keeping for families and children.
Lynne was interviewed for the podcast "As the Crow Flies". The first episode focuses on why listening matters and the second one on listening skills.
Here are two talks Lynne gave on listening (recorded in audio form on YouTube): Listening for Mission and Ministry and Why Listening Matters for Mission and Ministry.
"Lynne's writing is beautiful. Her tone has such a note of hope and excitement about growth. It is gentle and affirming."
— a reader
"Dear Dr. Baab, You changed my life. It is only through God’s gift of the sabbath that I feel in my heart and soul that God loves me apart from anything I do."
— a reader of Sabbath Keeping
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