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Friendship, loneliness, and prayer: The most important listening skill

Lynne Baab • Wednesday November 29 2023

Here are three listening scenarios. See if you resonate with any of them.

1. You are shopping for groceries and run into a former neighbor who you used to like a lot. They pause with their shopping basket, and you chat with them for a few minutes. You know you can’t talk long because you need to get home to do a few things. The entire time you are catching up with this kind and interesting person, you feel inner pressure to get moving.

2. A close friend is telling you about marriage challenges. You have heard permutations of this story many times...

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Friendship, Loneliness, and Prayer: When to Talk

Lynne Baab • Wednesday November 15 2023

If listening is a major way to show love and care in conversations, should we always listen and never talk? No. How do we know when to listen and talk when we are conversing with a friend, and we want to nurture our connection with them? Ah, that’s the challenging part that requires wisdom. We can ask God for wisdom and rely on the Holy Spirit to guide us.

When I ponder why I talk in conversations, I can think of many reasons:

(1) I’m often looking for support and encouragement. To receive it, I have to reveal what’s going on in my...

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Friendship, loneliness, and prayer: Types of reflecting, a listening skill

Lynne Baab • Tuesday October 31 2023

The listening skill reflection or reflecting can range from simple to complex. I want to open this post with a story about the most challenging form of reflecting, drawing implications:

When we moved to New Zealand in 2007, we rented out our Seattle house. We put a lock on the door of the family room in the basement and stored our furniture and my hundreds of books there. After two years, our tenants wanted to buy the house, and the timing felt right. So we returned to Seattle and had a giant sale of most of the stuff in that family room,...

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Friendship, loneliness, and prayer: One more way reflecting helps us

Lynne Baab • Tuesday October 17 2023

Two weeks ago, I opened a post with a story about a friend who was telling me about the funeral she attended. I asked you to imagine that I was watching her body language. Because she was drooping a bit and had a sad expression on her face, I imagined that I said to her, “You look really sad.” That’s a form of reflecting or reflection, a listening skill where we make a brief statement about what we’re observing in the person’s body language, tone of voice, or words. I said that my words were an invitation for her to talk...

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